We’ve all been there. When we requested to do something, and we feel reluctant to confirm. While others may have an easy time saying no, others have mastered the right way to decline the request without hurting anybody’s feelings. By doing this, we not only feel guilt-free, but you’re not hurting anyone’s feelings. So our goal is to convey two messages: I care about our relationship, but I am not able to accommodate your request.

Start Small

If you happen to be a people pleaser, you may want to start small. Start a goal that accommodates to your personality. That could be saying no five times a day. For example, “No, I do not want to apply for your newsletter. It’s small skills like these that become easier after practice.

Rehearse Your Declination

It’s never a bad idea to have a go-to phrase. Some people actually rehearse their declination remarks so that they have a go-to saying in times of panic. For example, “I appreciate your invitation. But I’m sorry I have other plans ahead of me so I cannot be available for this event.” Often, people will respect your decision without prying.

Ask For Some Time to Think About It

Some things are easier to decide on such as watching your friends children in cases of emergency. But sometimes they’re difficult to deal with. So you can go ahead and take a pause when you find yourself in that situation. For example, if your friend asks if you can babysit their pet snake. This might feel a bit uncomfortable for you, so ask for some time to think about it.

Say No, But Offer a Favor

You can negotiate while saying no. This method is a yes, no, yes. So at this point, you’re saying yes to the relationship such as “Tom is such an adorable child.” And then you say no to the request, by adding, “I’m sorry I’ll be away during the weekend so I can’t watch him.” But you can say yes by offering something else such as, “But I’d be happy to give him a ride for karate class on Thursday.”